Creative Writing: The Fish

Posted by Joanne Huspek

I am armpit deep into a major developmental edit, trying to accomplish most of it before NaNoWriMo, so I really don’t have much time to spew about my life or to wonder about whether or not I’m editing correctly. (I’ve thrown in the Paperclip Method, as well as index cards and handwritten notes, and all I have to show for it is a major headache.) So, instead, I will entertain you with a piece of creative writing, an assignment from the 21 Moments class I took last year.

muralfarright2

The Fish

When you were a baby, I watched you sleep. I had to make absolutely certain you were still alive, still breathing. For hours, I saw your chest rise and fall, your lips slightly parted, two perfect soft hearts lined in violet red. Your eyes twitched with baby dreams. I wondered, what could you possibly be dreaming of, my little boy who had yet to experience life.

I marveled at your skin, so pale and covered in a paler, soft fuzz. A furry caterpillar across your brow, one that rarely moved. The dark hair, so long on one side. Toes and nails of perfect pearl. You were a porcelain doll, a breathing miniature human.

Now I watch you sleep, my heart heavy with concern. Your breathing is labored, not steady. Your skin is stained red, not a healthy rose, but a dull, almost brick color. I couldn’t wake you after a day and a half. Panic filled my chest, one already bursting with worry.

Life is tenuous. It takes very little to tip the scales.

I considered calling the hospital. I won’t bother 911, they’ve already received enough calls from this address. The doctors might say something encouraging, something that will tamp down the alarm.

Your breathing seems suspended, but you’re not holding your breath. It’s shallow, that’s all. I touch your hand; it’s burning. You said you didn’t feel well. Is it sickness, a bug, or something more substantial? I bring soup, but you won’t awaken. I finger my phone, the numbers are typed in, but I don’t hit SEND. Instead, I pray my boy will wake up and talk to me. I hope he will take a sip of the chicken noodle. I pray to God he will give my son a baby dream, so he will dream like he did when he was two months old.

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And The Bad News Is…

Posted by Joanne Huspek

I am the one person on earth who would never consider myself to be highly intelligent. If I were, I’d probably be a billionaire by now, but we know that’s not happening, so… yeah.

I’m smarter than most, but not smarter than the average bear. This also may be age-related, but I also find it increasingly more and more difficult to see things in their true light. Too many years fogged by repetitious activities. Bad habits are really hard to correct.

Why the morose musings?

Last week, I finally received the complete edit to Virtually Yours Forever. With editorial notes at the end. Finally.

I wish I’d received those editorial notes, oh, say about four months ago, before I deluded myself into thinking this work was ready for prime time.

Oh, well, that’s why I employ my Editor for Life. He’s supposed to slap me around once in a while. (Thank goodness he’s in California, and I’m in Michigan.)

So the bad news is that I have some serious developmental editing to complete.

The good news is that the light bulb finally went off above my head. (This is always good news.) After reading the editorial notes, I went over my outline. Ugh. He was right. Fatal flaws all over the place. It’s all very daunting, but nothing that can’t be fixed with a little hard work and elbow grease.

Unfortunately, this past week, I’ve been engaged in a place sans computer or internet. However, I always carry my trusty notebook with me. And a hard copy print out of the MS.

Part of my problem with this novel was the timing was off. As with Virtually Yours, VY4ever takes place in a 30 day time frame. When writing so linearly, it’s best to make use of a calendar.

editsI also employed this method writing Finding Cadence. One can get very lost in a seven-month story.

Doing this allowed me to see where my holes were. I need tighten up the time frame. I’ll keep the same words, just put them closer together, and delete anything that isn’t advancing the story. (There’s a lot of that going on as well.)

The other problem is that some of my moms aren’t carrying their weight. (This is my fault, obviously.) Three of them are shining, the other three – meh. I experienced this problem in writing the first book as well. I *know* my stronger characters very well; it’s the ancillary ones that are difficult, probably because they are so not me. These characters either need some sort of drama to muddle through (oh, how I remember doing this for the first book!) or what I already gave them as problems to be fleshed out a little more. Either way, I have to step outside of myself and give them the attention they deserve.

Smaller problems included changing the age of one of the kids; speeding up and researching snowfall patterns; I’ll also change the names of the celebrities I mentioned who are way-out-there characters in the story line. One, the Real Donald Trump is running for president, and I can’t put him into my book now. Not using that name, anyway. I’ll still need his persona, his helicopter and private jet, and his high rise building, but he’ll be fictional now.

So yes, I have my entire month planned for this edit. I’m still on track (I hope!) to a winter release.

And for some more good news?

I’ve come out with a print version of Virtually Yours, for those of you who are digitally challenged. You can purchase a copy on Amazon, or if you can wait until I receive my shipment, and purchase one directly from me, which of course will be autographed by the author. If you are interested in obtaining a signed copy, please contact me at

jlhuspek [at] msn [dot] com or leave a message here or on Facebook.

Happy reading!

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Can a Writer Tweak Too Much? Considering the Options

Posted by Joanne Huspek

I have been armpit deep into a major developmental edit for the last eight months. It’s one that has delayed my getting Virtually Yours Forever off the ground and into the query queue for nearly a year.

VIrtually Yours Forever (72dpi 900x600) smallMight be the cover. Not sure yet.

Keep in mind that before I decided to go off the deep end and explore the possibility of adding a parallel plot line and three more characters, I thought the book was done – finished – completed. I’d edited it at least three times with my ED4Life, and ran it by another independent editor for a second opinion just to be on the safe side. (The second opinion was glowing, by the way. And this from a women who had not read the original novel.)

But then came this idea… This crazy idea that would bring the story into current times. That would add a layer of whacky. That might spin off into a screenplay. (Definitely could see this on the screen, oh, yes!)

This story line would need a ring of authenticity, so I enlisted a former employee who happens to work for the Feds to point me in the right direction. He can’t give me specifics, but I hoped he might okay the gist of what I was going for, or reel me in if I was totally off the wall.

And while I think the idea has merit (if I can pull it off), I think my original idea has merit, too. It’s not like there wasn’t enough going on with the Virtual Moms; if anything, their plates were not just full, but overflowing.

Which has lead me to the current train of thought: Can a writer tweak too much?

I know with other areas of the arts, yes, yes, you can fiddle too much. Take painting. You can add and add until your vision is obscured by busy-ness. You can get too close or fret over tiny issues that a random observer isn’t even going to notice.

After all, less is more, right?

On the other hand, an artful layering will be picked up – and appreciated – by discerning eyes.

As artists, we tend to worry about the finished product. Is it ready? Could I have done more? Will people enjoy it?

And so, the conundrum. At some point, you have to trust your heart and your judgement. You have to step back and let it go. Hope for the best, and move on to the next project, because worrying is not productive.

Posted in books, editing, indie publishing, Joanne Huspek, manners, Monday Blogs, querying, reading, rewriting, San Francisco, San Francisco Writers Conference, Self publishing, VIRTUALLY YOURS, VIRTUALLY YOURS FOREVER, womens literature, writers conference, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , Comment

From A Work In Progress

Posted by Joanne Huspek

Yes, I’m still working on my work(s) in progress.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/superfantastic/166215927/in/photolist-fFUcR-qw1igh-9yobFu-9yob4h-ahbVQh-ahbVQU-ahbVPW-eeyY5M-aa63H9-ptwuzW-ahbVQG-ahbVPf-bqnFTw-bWQGU-77SbA2-7xzGd6-tbxSqV-5jg2zy-6FhjJd-9crNam-aiMJT1-7PC8rQ-6PPjpP-37fGU8-6JNJRk-9ykbtx-dSZYCR-25kHDR-4um46A-fmXy7c-e1sxjy-7VmH6t-dkA7nP-9ykakx-4b1hQC-eXezT7-9ykbXK-9yo9XG-9yka4g-gE1Vjn-9yoayw-7F4xRE-4qFJrB-2KwzhL-6JSPuh-brcWkd-dTqn3K-poFQfi-fosJvk-8YS64a

Photo courtesy Creative Commons.

I loved the way she smoked cigarettes.

Yeah, we know smoking is bad for you. Cancer. Heart attack. Tarry kisses tinged in ash. An expensive addiction. It’s a disgusting habit. Yada-yada.

I’d always been enthralled with the way she executed her vice, her movements a poetry. She’d extract the cigarette from the package, using the tips of her long, painted nails, a perfect manicure at the end of long, slender fingers. After the cig had been freed, she’d tap the end of it against the pack gently, one, two, three times – no more – before balancing the stick between her first and second fingers of her right hand. The filter poised near lips that first pouted against entry, but relented. Usually sparks came via someone else’s lighter, but she’d do it herself in a pinch. The first exaggerated draw, a slight escape of smoke from the corner of her mouth, before she sucked it in. After the exhale, she’d extend her right arm away, an ebb of vice, a pregnant pause.

She’d sit pensive after that first puff, her eyes clouded over, her face slack. She’d left our world for her own, perhaps considering what might have been instead of her current reality. Maybe she dreamed of being the mistress of a mansion. I knew Grandma had lived in one, back in the day. She’d told me the stories of the grand staircases, the stained glass, the carved friezes. There had been butlers and maids and flouncy party dresses and all the ice cream you could dream of. But Grandma was gone now, along with the trappings of privilege. We’d been relegated to a matchbox of a house, where the windows leaked air and rain and the kitchen cabinets didn’t shut right because the hinges were bent and rusted. Where worn coats were mended and a full stomach was a guilty pleasure.

“Mama?” I tapped her arm, the free one.

She roused as if from a dream and scowled at me. “What? What do you want now? Can’t I get one minute of peace?” Her words snapped, short and mean, but she held the cigarette with the elegance of a society girl.

“I’m hungry, Mama.”

She glared at me, tapped spent ash onto the tray, before lifting the cigarette to her lips, drawing long. She closed her eyes and journeyed to her faraway place, taking the scenic route to a location without interruptions.

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Writing and the Takeaway

Posted by Joanne Huspek

Front Cover.3518981

Why do you read? To be transported into another world, another time, another set of circumstances? To be entertained? To be frightened out of your mind or to feel deep emotion? To learn something new?

Why do you write? To tell a story? To escape from your Real World? To impart knowledge? To entertain?

I think most writers begin with an overwhelming urge to tell a story, whether it be theirs or someone else’s. They start with a ‘what if’ and move on from there. I know that’s how I started. I’d never completed a novel before (my basement is littered with boxes of quarter-written ideas) – my impetus was to get to those magic words “The End.”

It took me a long, long, long time to achieve that goal. Writing is exhausting, especially the first time around. First drafts are usually awful; mine was about as bad as a first draft can get. I made every mistake in spades. Many times over.

But it’s not over with the first “The End.” During the rewriting process, a good writer will pick over the bones of their work. They’ll tease out the good and round-can the bad. Then they will discover themes and plot twists and parallel story lines and a whole host of other interesting things.

Have you noticed that the best novels have stories and characters that stay with you, long after you’ve finished the book? Every novel has what I call a “takeaway,” or what the reader will discover beyond the initial story. Sometimes the takeaway is blatant. Love conquers all (the romantic takeaway).

Example: I finished “In a Perfect World” by Laura Kasischke, and was immediately moved. So moved, I told everyone about this book. So moved, I even lent it to friends (I never lend books to friends, certainly not favorite books). I still think about the characters, and it’s been years since I’ve read the book. Why? The characters successfully moved beyond their initial circumstances and grew into strong women. Every once in a while, I’ll think about them. Did they survive? Did the world?

The takeaway? Even in the midst of crisis, you can dig deep inside and find strength. (Whether or not the strength is enough, remains to be seen.)

Without going into detail and spoiling the fun, I can give you the takeaway to my novels:

Virtually Yours: Things on the Internet are not as they seem. Friendship ebbs and overflows. Love conquers all. 🙂

Finding Cadence: Once you’ve hit bottom, the only way to go is up (of course, that journey might take some side-trips). People are not what/who they seem to be. Friendship overflows and ebbs. A scarred heart can love again. Or at least see that goal in the future.

When writing, I didn’t consciously put these takeaways into my work. I was too busy birthing these babies to notice what the hell I was doing! It was only after rewriting, editing, and discussing my stories with my ED for life and others did I realize that I was trying to relate something more than the story.

A good story contains a depth that will resonate with the reader long after they’ve finished the book. A finely crafted novel is just that – crafted. Toiled over, worked over, picked over and put back together. Unless you’re very lucky or very smart, you can’t do it in a minute.

Currently editing my next novel, I know that producing it will take a lot of thought.

After all, I’m telling more than just a story.

🙂

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Falling On Your Ass and the Serendipity of the Creative

Posted by Joanne Huspek

I try to visit the Bay Area a couple of times a year. Besides loving NorCal, I still have a child living in San Francisco, which makes visiting a requisite. The San Francisco Writers Conference is the mandatory February trip, but just about any other time of the year beats Michigan weather hands down – yes, even the San Francisco summer fog-in.

After last February’s conference, my son and I took a trip to Marin County, to visit Muir Woods (fabulous place! Go there if you can before you die.) and hit up some coastal eating. I enjoy walking on beaches – Ocean Beach being my favorite cityside beach – but every beach is different. Some are wide, expansive, and flat, like Ocean Beach. Others are rocky and treacherous. Most are in between. Cliffs line most of the coast. A straight one thousand foot drop off is not beach blanket bingo material. Northern California beaches are what I would consider ‘rustic’ – you won’t see fish taco stands and amusement piers, and the surfers are in wet suits, not bare-chested.

I’m so old, I now only travel with sensible shoes. Muir Beach is a spot of a beach. The part closest to the parking lot is sandy and relatively flat, and I took off my hiking shoes to enjoy the sand.

My son decided to explore the area just north of the main beach. Of course, he didn’t tell me; he just stalked off. Since he is over six feet tall with lanky legs and I am but a midget, I struggled to keep up with him.

The tide was out, exposing extremely rocky terrain, a complete 180 degree departure from a few yards away. Black boulders sported thousands of edible mussels. Suffice it to say, there were more small, pointy rocks on this beach than there was sand. Maneuvering the area was like walking barefoot on a carpet of hot Legos. Between huge rocks and small rocks, there was nothing of note to grab onto. Call me stubborn (I am) but I decided not to put my shoes back on. (Bad move.)

As luck would have it, because I’m old, not very spry, and because I have no good luck, I lost my balance and fell.

Falling at my age is a risky proposition. Oh, I’m beyond embarrassment. Who cares about a momentary social faux pas? I could break something I really need – like my legs. Or my head.

Before a nice young man (not my son) came to assist me to my feet, I happened to look to my side. I saw something I had never seen before on a California beach.

Sea glass.

You don’t understand. I’d been visiting California for years. I’ve found lots of things on the beach, including shells, sand dollars, garbage, driftwood, a starfish, crab bodies, even a bloated and rotting sea lion. I have never once found a piece of sea glass worth putting into my pocket.

After I had been righted into a supine position, I yelled at my son. We had hit the sea glass lottery. I instructed him to pick up any glass he could that was bigger than a speck.

This is what we came up with.

seaglassoriginal

Since February, I had stashed my sea glass in a used Altoid’s container, waiting for creativity to strike me like lightning. Every so often, I would take the glass out, compare each piece, turn it over in my hand. (I do this with stones, often. Before I set something into a piece of jewelry, I let the stone speak to me.) I would think about where the glass originated, what journey it took to end up a smooth piece of silica on a Northern California beach. Who drank from that bottle? Who tossed the container into the trash? Did it come from Asia, or somewhere closer? And how was I so lucky as to literally fall on it during a challenging yet pleasant walk on the beach with my son?

Finally, the glass spoke, and this is what I came up with.

seaglass1

(Currently on my neck and not for sale. Yet.) 🙂

seaglass2

Here’s another one. This one is going in the booth at the Ann Arbor Art Fair this week.

Here is what we need to remember as artists: Sometimes, things are thrown our way – beautiful, ugly, inconsequential, glaring. Sometimes we fall on our ass. Sometimes it takes a while before “garbage” becomes art. Sometimes there is suffering, buffering, tumbling in sand to smooth the rough edges. Sometimes you have to dig deep to find the true story, inciting motives, genuine characters.

The thing to remember is that there is art in every thing.

Even in falling on your ass.

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A Writer Helps Another…For What It’s Worth…

Posted by Joanne Huspek
 As is sometimes the case, aspiring authors occasionally ask me for advice. (!) I know! Last week, I received an inquiry regarding self-publishing using BookBaby. I might not have all the answers, and I certainly won’t have all the right answers, but it’s important to me to pass on information. There’s no such thing as too much info! This also gives me a chance to introduce to you another writer. All stories desire one thing, and that is to be heard.
The Aspiring Author
Obaid Chowdhury’s A Soldier’s Debt is about a 75,000-word memoir retelling his rebellion against his own military, one which committed a genocide against his native Bengali community. Mr. Chowdhury later escaped to participate in the liberation of Bangladesh in 1971. Mr. Chowdhury is currently penning a sequel, one which details specific battle actions that earned him a prestigious gallantry award.
See the YouTube video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=14&v=c6WbV-Azwi8
And now, for the questions:
Obaid Chowdhury: The Cover. Should it be soft or hard? Do I need a dust cover; is it necessary? Which is the most cost effective? I have a tentative cover design. But I would like to consult another designer if he can come up with a better and attractive one to depict the story theme.
JH: Cover is key. Check out Joel Frielander’s web site and study it. Each month, he critiques book covers with a fine eye. Pay attention to what he says about art work and font types and sizes. Look for books that are similar to yours and the design. (I did not design my first cover although I had input, but I helped with the second.) You want to tell a story with your cover, or at least convey a theme or define a genre. You want the reader to pick it up if they are in a bookstore, or linger if they are shopping online. Cover designers are everywhere, and most will design a cover for very little money. We have an art college here with a bulletin board and design students will fight for the job. You shouldn’t have to pay more than a couple hundred dollars. Soft covers are best on a budget, unless you have a book publisher for a best friend.

 

OB: Formating and Design. Should I use their in-house services or use an outside professional? Any idea which will be cost effective and better?

 

JH: Book Baby has a minimum formatting guide and you need to follow it, otherwise when you submit, your manuscript will look wonky. I didn’t know about manuscript formatting when I wrote my first book. I just kept writing it using my own formatting. WRONG. This is not to say that you will be stuck rewriting. Seat-of-pants formatting can be fixed, but it’s time consuming and a colossal pain in the rear. Book Babywill only allow one formatting change before it begins to cost you money, so you want to make sure your manuscript is as near perfect as you can before you upload.

OC: Size. Is 6″ X 9″ trade size okay for my project? Do you have any better suggestion?

JH: Sounds right to me.

OC: Paper. What’s best cost effective and quality paper? Is 60lb natural okay, or need a different on to give a better presentation?

JH: No matter who you choose, whether it’s a local book publisher or someone online, don’t be afraid to ask for samples. I published my second book on CreateSpace, but nearly didn’t because I had purchased a CreateSpace book many years before and the physical appearance was sub-par. When I considered them later, I asked for a sample and they provided one. They really improved – the cover stock, the interior pages, the printing, which is why I went with them. I have no idea what BookBaby’s physical books look like, you might want to ask for a sample.

OC: Interior:  The text will be black. I may have some pictures, maps and charts. They are mostly black-n-white. Any suggestion about their design and/or coloring?

JH: Keep in mind that photographs, maps, and charts will cost money. They also interfere with the formatting of text. Should you decide that photos, maps, and charts are necessary, make certain you have legal rights to use them in your book. If you did not take the photos, you may have to hunt down who did, and ask for permission to use them. As always, credit the photos in the front of your book.

OC: Editing. My project has been edited by Editoro! Do I still need their in-house editing?

JH: No. Definitely not, you are not required to use any editor. Remember though, you need to send a pristine manuscript to vendors like BookBaby or CreateSpace – they are assuming it’s perfect and are not going to make corrections on a glaring error. Much as I love Mr. ED (disclaimer: he is also my developmental editor) and he is kick ass, I would still run the manuscript by a proofreader, a critique partner who is good at proofreading, or something similar. Do it a couple of times. A dozen times. Your developmental editor will not pick up on typos (YOU will not pick up on typos), misspellings, or weird grammar. I’m terrible at proofreading my own work, and I see where there are mistakes in my first novel. With the second, I went over that (with others) over a dozen times. Get SmartEdit. I did, and run my work through it religiously. It doesn’t proofread, but it reviews your manuscript and adds up how many times you might use a particular word or phrase (redundancy – the bane of the writer). I try to limit my use of a particular word to less than 100 times in a 100K novel (my own personal goal). Smart Edit will question spellings, punctuation and other word problems. I also use it to tighten up my sentences, therefore eliminating a lot of unnecessary words.

OC: Promo & Marketing. How effective is their promo and marketing campaigns? Do the generate sales?

JH: I’m afraid the only entity that will generate sales is YOU. I do not rely on anyone for promo. I tried it, it just doesn’t work. You should follow Frances Caballo  – she is a whiz at social media for authors. I have to say I can barely follow most of her techniques, but you will learn a lot by reading her. Also, before you launch, set up a Goodreads page for yourself (and an Amazon page – I haven’t done that yet, but who has time?).

OC: BookBaby and Smashwords. Which agency you think better? The problems you mentioned, were they with BB or SW?

JH: I haven’t used Smashwords. I attempted to, but it gave me a headache. 🙂 I’ve heard that it’s now easier so I may give them a spin again. I’ve found BookBaby to be extremely responsive to my questions. Actually, so is CreateSpace. You call them, they call you back. Maybe I’ll give the Smashwords manual another go someday, but I don’t have time, and I’m also not very internet/design savvy.

You can follow Obaid Chowdhury HERE.

 

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